funnybill.com

One Hundred Years Ago

2005-08-22T03:14:00.000-04:00

The following was a piece of forwarded chain-mail, but I found it interesting, so instead I paste it here.

THE YEAR 1905

This will boggle your mind, I know it did mine!
The year is 1905.
One hundred years ago.
What a difference a century makes!

Here are some of the U.S. statistics for the Year 1905 :

The average life expectancy in the U.S. was 47 years.

Only 14 percent of the homes in the U.S. had a bathtub.

Only 8 percent of the homes had a telephone.

A three-minute call from Denver to New York City cost eleven dollars.

There were only 8,000 cars in the U.S., and only 144 miles of paved roads.

The maximum speed limit in most cities was 10 mph.

Alabama, Mississippi, Iowa, and Tennessee were each more heavily populated than California.

With a mere 1.4 million people, California was only the 21st most populous state in the Union.

The tallest structure in the world was the Eiffel Tower!

The average wage in the U.S. was 22 cents per hour.

The average U.S. worker made between $200 and $400 per year

A competent accountant could expect to earn $2000 per year,

a dentist $2,500 per year,

a veterinarian between $1,500 and $4,000 per year, and

a mechanical engineer about $5,000 per year.

More than 95 percent of all births in the U.S. took place at home .

Ninety percent of all U.S. doctors had no college education.

Instead, they attended so-called medical schools, many of which were condemned in the press and by the government as "substandard."

Sugar cost four cents a pound.

Eggs were fourteen cents a dozen.

Coffee was fifteen cents a pound.

Most women only washed their hair once a month, and used borax or egg yolks for shampoo.

Canada passed a law that prohibited poor people from entering into their country for any reason.

Five leading causes of death in the U.S. were:

1. Pneumonia and influenza

2. Tuberculosis

3. Diarrhea

4. Heart disease

5. Stroke

The American flag had 45 stars.

Arizona, Oklahoma, New Mexico, Hawaii, and Alaska hadn't been admitted to the Union yet.

The population of Las Vegas, Nevada, was only 30!!!

Crossword puzzles, canned beer,

and ice tea hadn't been invented yet.

There was no Mother's Day or Father's Day.

Two out of every 10 U.S. adults couldn't read or write.

Only 6 percent of all Americans had graduated from high school.

Marijuana, heroin, and morphine were all available over the counter at the local corner drugstores..
Back then pharmacist said, "Heroin clears the complexion, gives buoyancy to the mind, regulates the stomach and bowels, and is, in fact, a perfect guardian of health." (Shocking!)

Eighteen percent of households in the U.S. had at least one full-time servant or domestic help.

There were about 230 reported murders in the entire U.S.

News, and Ass Kicking

2005-07-20T16:09:00.000-04:00

What do you get when you cross a blog with video? You get a dumb combined word: vlog.

Dumb names aside, I suggest you check out rocketboom.com where a small group of people produce a daily newscast, three minutes long, and quite entertaining.

--

I read a comment online about our military efforts from someone who called themselves Josh. I don't know who Josh is, but I quasi-agree with him.

It is not the job of our military to do humanitarian work. The military's job is to kick f***ing ass when ass needs to be kicked. This was not a situation where ass needed to be kicked. There are other asses that needed kicking. This war is a waste of time and resources, now its a waste of lives.

Our ass kickers are stuck in a vulnerable position trying "nation build" -- which is exactly what Bush said wouldn't work in 2000. Let another task force handle the nation building -- UN or otherwise that is capable. Let our warriors return to ass kicking where asses need to be kicked (Osama Bin Laden, anyone?). This is what they are good at.

To clarify my stance, I don't think we should pull out our troops... we need to finish what we started. But in retrospect, with no WMDs and the ~~terrible~~ questionable intelligence that was used as initial justification, ass-kicking may have been better utilized elsewhere.

He updated it?

2005-07-15T05:15:00.000-04:00

Yes, it appears I have updated funnybill.com. It's a work in progress. There were some issues with my hosting provider that, for a long time, prevented me from posting here. I've worked together a solution and may actually begin updating this again.

My posts (rants) about things in the news, things on the internet, or even your mom will be found right here. For your convenience, previews of my journal posts can be found on the main page of funnybill.com as well.

funnybill.com: excellence in worthlessness since 2002

Journal: Beer, Trains, and Birthdays

2005-03-25T18:41:00.000-05:00

I've updated my journal with some of the highlights of the past couple weeks.

Click here to read the full post.

Rant: AIM and AOL are evil

2005-03-13T17:43:00.000-05:00

Will someone just shoot AOL and put us all out of our misery?

Luckily the AOL dial-up internet service is slowly dying, but they still hold us in their grasps with AIM, also known as AOL Instant Messenger.

I'd say more than half of the people I know use instant messenger, and for a good portion of them, it is one of the primary ways we keep in contact. There are a lot of friends from high school, old classes, or former jobs that I simply wouldn't know anymore were it not for the ease of communication provided by IM.

AIM isn't the only option. Yahoo and MSN/Microsoft both have their own IM systems, both of which I have tried and use from time to time.

The problem is, the majority of people I know use AIM. If I choose to use a different instant messenger, I won't be able to talk to them anymore unless they switch too.

So I'm stuck with the problem of AOL/AIM being evil, but the only viable option.

I've dealt with it by using a different IM client called Trillian. An IM client is the program actually on your computer that you use to connect to the IM service. Most people use the AIM client to connect to the AIM service, but it isn't the only option. Trillian lets you connect to AIM, Yahoo, MSN, and more without advertisements. It also includes plenty of themes to choose from so you can customize the look.

The latest irritating news from AIM I read about today on tuaw.com - a recent change in AIM's privacy policy:

"Although you or the owner of the Content retain ownership of all right, title and interest in Content that you post to any AIM Product, AOL owns all right, title and interest in any compilation, collective work or other derivative work created by AOL using or incorporating this Content. In addition, by posting Content on an AIM Product, you grant AOL, its parent, affiliates, subsidiaries, assigns, agents and licensees the irrevocable, perpetual, worldwide right to reproduce, display, perform, distribute, adapt and promote this Content in any medium.

You waive any right to privacy. You waive any right to inspect or approve uses of the Content or to be compensated for any such uses."

What the hell? I realize that they are most likely being overly broad and don't necessarily plan to do anything shady, but... they could. And I don't like it.

Seriously people, we need a cool company to make an IM service I can live with. Or everyone needs to switch over to a better one. So get on that.

Journal: Lucky Me

2005-03-04T13:47:00.000-05:00

I went to buy a refreshing Dr. Pepper before French class from one of the vending machines on the other side of the building.

I put in my dollar and ten cents (what is what that?), pressed the button, and heard a less-than-familiar thump ba dump. The Dr. Pepper had fallen, but not to its intended destination.

Read the full entry...

I'd Buy That For a Dollar

2005-02-22T17:03:00.000-05:00

Google's AdWords program (in which text ads are displayed based on the content of a website) has been quite sucessful, but it flubs up from time to time.

The ad used for ebay, in which a key word that is a potential product gets inserted into a generic ad, sometimes goes awry.

I saw this ad on a political blog:

If that's not creative campaign financing, I don't know what is.

Journal: A Year Ago, Today

2005-02-16T09:54:00.000-05:00

Having an online journal and my pictures posted on the web makes it easier for me to look back and reminisce, whether anyone else cares to look at them.

Read the full entry...

Happy kitty

2005-02-09T05:47:00.000-05:00

I feel good
Originally uploaded by Cilest.

I came across this photo on flickr and decided it needed to be shared.

What a happy looking cat... I wish I could sleep all day. Oh wait...

Five second rule?

2005-01-24T09:37:00.000-05:00

The USA TODAY ran one of their infographics today, showing how America responded to "Do you eat food dropped on the floor?"

More people were cautious about it than I would have expected.

10% admitted to following a three-second rule
8% were cool with a five-second rule
4% thought a ten-second rule was fair game

...but an overwhelming 78% said food on the floor was simply not safe.

Wimps. (Note: I'm a fan of the ten second rule if the floor looks clean and you blow on the food a little. I would NOT eat food off our kitchen floor, as that would be hazordous to my health.)

Plaid: Color, or atrocity?

2005-01-14T15:24:00.000-05:00

Against my better judgement, I entered a Wal-Mart store recently.

On the intercom, an elderly woman's voice posed a question for all shoppers:

"And what man doesn't love a nice plaid shirt?"

Well folks, I'm not sure what else there is to say about that.

Happy Holidaze

2004-12-31T22:12:00.000-05:00

"It's time for small pleasures."

My cup of mint hot chocolate at a Starbucks visit yesterday. That stuff is GOOD.

Plural(s)

2004-12-08T16:43:00.000-05:00

Did you know that "data" is plural for "datum"?

Did you know that "graffiti" is plural for the lesser used "graffito"?

Oh, you did? Well I sure feel dumb.

New DHS Director

2004-12-05T19:04:00.000-05:00

"At homeland defense: black belt with street smarts"... an article about the cabinet secretary-designate for Homeland Security, Bernard Kerik.

The article mentions that, in addition to being the commissioner of the New York City Police Department at the time of 9/11, he is also a "former security guard for the Saudi Royal family".

Does that seem weird to anyone else?

Flickr... Cool Indeed

2004-12-03T23:45:00.000-05:00

is the coolest online photo sharing thing-a-ma-bob I've seen in a while. Or ever.

You should try it. There are free accounts. I'm tempted to shell out the cash for the pro account.

With a Side of Angina

2004-11-23T14:08:00.000-05:00

Today at McDonald's, I noticed they had reordered their extra value meals. Number three is now the Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese meal. Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't "Half Pound of Meat Burger" more accurate than Double Quarter Pounder? According to the nutritional facts website, it also packs a punch with 40 grams of fat. That's ten more grams than the Big Mac. Yum.

A Night of Rock

2004-11-18T14:29:00.000-05:00

Tonight... a NIGHT OF ROCK. WMSR style.

Also: Today's journal entry about the concert and firefighterness.

Get Firefox, or Be Dumb

2004-11-14T13:41:00.000-05:00

The Washington Post says:

After Microsoft cemented a monopoly of the Web-browser market, it let Internet Explorer go stale, parceling out ho-hum updates that neglected vulnerabilities routinely exploited by hostile Web sites. Not until August's Windows XP Service Pack 2 update did (some) users get any real relief.

And yet people found reasons to stick with IE -- alternative browsers cost money, were too slow, too complicated, or didn't work with enough Web sites.

No more.

They released Firefox v1.0 on November 9th. It had over 2 million downloads in the first two days. If you're still using Internet Explorer, my condolences.

www.getfirefox.com

A Bushism or Three

2004-10-28T14:12:00.000-04:00

President Bush:

"Secondly, the tactics of our—as you know, we don't have relationships with Iran. I mean, that's—ever since the late '70s, we have no contacts with them, and we've totally sanctioned them. In other words, there's no sanctions—you can't—we're out of sanctions."—Annandale, Va., Aug. 9, 2004

"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we."—Washington, D.C., Aug. 5, 2004

and

"People make suggestions on what to say all the time. I'll give you an example; I don't read what's handed to me. People say, 'Here, here's your speech, or here's an idea for a speech.' They're changed. Trust me."—Interview with the New York Times, March 15, 2000

Maybe he should look into reading the script.

A Bi-Partisan Message

2004-10-22T13:42:00.000-04:00

A Bi-Partisan Message from Funnybill.com:

(actually, my friend Aaron IMed me this and I thought I would pass it along)

There are less than three weeks until the election, an election that will decide the next President of the United States. The man elected will be the president of all Americans, not just the Democrats or the Republicans.

To show our solidarity as Americans, let's all get together and show each other our support for the candidate of our choice. It's time that we all came together, Democrats and Republicans alike.

If you support the policies and character of John Kerry, please drive with your headlights on during the day.

If you support President George W. Bush, please drive with your headlights off at night.

And God bless America.

Mayhem in O-Town

2004-10-20T13:06:00.000-04:00

On Monday night, an Oxford, Ohio man fired random shots with a handgun and an AK-47 assault rifle as around 30 law enforcement officers kept him surrounded for over two hours until he was fatally shot.

Interestingly, the Miami Student, student newspaper at Miami University, published the story before mainstream media like the Cincinnati Enquirer knew of the story.

Read their story here.

I wasn't on call when it happened, but from what I hear it was quite the incident. The AK-47 he was using fires rounds that easily pierce the "bullet-proof" vests of all the officers on the scene... even the SWAT team. They were basically sitting ducks for a couple hours as he randomly fired here and there. From what I hear, it all ended when he exited the trailer and dropped his rifle down, pointing it at one of the Oxford police officers. As he did, one of the SWAT snipers fired, as well as the Oxford officer who was within his sights.

Crazy times in Oxford.

Toshiba TV: "Mayday!"

2004-10-18T13:35:00.000-04:00

If you spend too much time watching American Idol and re-runs of Who's The Boss, your television may call for help.

Some sort of electric glitch was causing van Rossman's TV to transmit on the international distress frequency. The signal was picked up by a satellite and relayed to the Air Force Rescue Coordination Center in Virginia.

Read the full story from ABC's WPVI.

2004-10-12T01:12:00.000-04:00

This sign captures the theme of funnybill.com during the past month or two... and for that I apologize. I swear I'm going to work on updating more often. As for now, I'm preparing for my trip to New York City with WMSR. I'll be posting about it in my journal, don't worry.

2004-10-11T18:14:00.000-04:00

Love and honor to Miami...

Sad But True

2004-07-31T00:23:00.000-04:00

Tonight my 13 year old sister approached me with the question:

"Is Jewish a language?"

I stared at her blankly until she walked away, singing a song she had heard in Hebrew.

She remarked, "Boy, I wish I was Jewish so I knew what these words meant."

Well isn't that special.